Excuses

Humans love to make excuses, don’t they. Like when we’re stuck at what to say, when somebody catches us red-handed, or use our words (especially when we accidentally had the wrong word choice) against us, we are just so inclined to create excuses to save our face.

Or at least I do. Anyway for me, it happened during scholarship interview I went to last… 15 April (wow long time I held on to this post eh). They kinda asked me why I didn’t choose to attend an overseas university and I just wanted to be honest saying that I didn’t feel confident, independent and qualified enough. Like, look at all those who went overseas and came back with all those funky accents and cheese like that. Can’t see myself being like them you know. And I haven’t actually quite finished yo! before the female interviewer was like, oh if you aren’t confident or think you’re qualified enough then why did you apply for this scholarship, because we are paying for your studies you know. And then I knew I shouldn’t have been honest then. So I kinda “shit you said the wrong thing u baboon u just killed yourself” so I started giving excuses like, oh I know that bla bla that’s why I’m deciding to stay in the local uni’s hostel and all so that I can learn to be independent and whatnot. Then I was also giving excuses to myself thinking that oh I actually wanted, should have said something about opportunities, how preparing for these was an enriching and whatever experience, which actually I was only just thinking about it moments before! Omg can’t help but smack my friggin head with popcorn and get black lung disease.

Anyway here I’d like to say that: it’s doesn’t matter what you meant to do, it’s your actions that matter. You know that fanfic quote “intentions don’t matter, actions do”. Besides, if you meant to have said it you should already have when you had the opportunity (#GrandpaRandy). No point regretting. Just take it as a learning experience.

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